First Look Wedding Photos: Are They Right For You?

If you’ve spent any time on wedding Pinterest boards or scrolling through dreamy highlight reels on Instagram, you’ve probably come across the idea of doing a first look at your wedding. But if you’re unfamiliar with what that means—or you’re not quite sure whether it’s right for you—let's talk about it.

As a wedding photographer, I’ve had a front-row seat to countless first look wedding moments: the quiet ones, the emotional ones, the giggly ones, the “I missed you so much” ones. I’ve also worked with couples who chose to wait until the ceremony to see each other, and felt completely confident in and happy with that choice. So let’s break down the pros and cons to help you decide what feels best for your wedding day.

But First—What Is A First Look?

A first look is a moment where you and your partner see each other for the first time before the wedding ceremony. It’s usually a private(ish) exchange—just the two of you and your photo/video team (standing far away with zoom lenses, promise).

Some couples use this time to calm their nerves, soak in the moment together, or simply start the together portion of their day earlier with some extra quality time.

The Pros Of First Look Wedding Photos

There are plenty of reasons couples choose to do a first look, and in my experience, these are the big ones:

You Get Privacy Before The Ceremony

There are no guests around yet, no pressure, and no 100+ sets of eyes watching your reaction. It’s a chance to have that emotional moment, but just for the two of you.

It Eases The Nerves

There’s something incredibly grounding about seeing your person. You get to take a deep breath, hold hands, hug, and remember that this day is about the two of you and your love. I’ve seen so many couples visibly relax after their first look and feel much more prepared to walk down the aisle.

You Can Actually Talk

When you see each other at the ceremony, you technically can talk… but most couples don’t. They usually just give the floor to their officiant, and the ceremony begins. Having a private first look lets you hug, kiss, and say all the things you're feeling in that moment.

You Won't Miss Cocktail Hour

This is a huge perk. If you do a first look, we can knock out your couple’s portraits, wedding party photos, and even family formals before the ceremony. That way, you’re not running around during cocktail hour trying to track down your uncle who wandered off for bacon-wrapped scallops or rushing through your newlywed photos because you're short on time.

The Day Feels Longer (In A Good Way!)

Without a first look, you might not see your partner until 5pm if you’re having a summer wedding—and by then, half the day is already gone. With a first look, you get to start your shared wedding experience much earlier. You’re not waiting around, getting more nervous by the minute, or counting down the hours until you finally get to be together. It's one of the best ways to slow down the day and actually be in it together, rather than feeling like it’s flying by.

The Cons of First Look Wedding Photos

While I am a big fan, a first look isn't necessarily right for everyone. Here are my biggest reasons you might want to skip it:

You Want That Walking-Down-The-Aisle Moment

Some couples dream of seeing each other for the first time at the altar. They want the build-up, the emotion, the classic experience—and that’s totally valid. It can be extremely special to see each other for the first time during the actual ceremony. (Just know that many couples who do a first look still get emotional walking down the aisle!)

You're Getting Married in a Church or Traditional Venue

In my experience, most church weddings skip the first look—sometimes for religious reasons, but often just because the flow of the day is already well structured. And since church weddings typically have later receptions or extended cocktail hours, you still have time for photos afterward.

You're Worried It Might Feel Too Staged

If you’re worried a first look will feel performative or awkward, there are ways to make it feel more natural (more on that below). But if you just know that it's not really for you and you want a super authentic reaction, that's okay too!

From A Photographer's Perspective, Do I Recommend It?

Yes, I typically recommend a first look wedding timeline.

Most of my couples care about being present on their wedding day—not feeling rushed, stressed, or pulled in a million directions. They want to enjoy their cocktail hour. They want the time to soak it all in and spend time with their loved ones. And from a photography perspective, it helps us create the best, most relaxed portraits without the time crunch.

That said, I never pressure couples. If a first look doesn’t feel aligned with your vision, we’ll create a timeline that works for you. And if you're still not sure whether it's right for you? Ask yourself these questions:

• Picture how you want the day to feel from start to finish.

• Think about your nerves—would seeing your partner earlier help calm them?

• Do you want more time for photos or more time with guests?

• Would you rather spend cocktail hour mingling or doing portraits?

Your answers to those questions will usually point you in the right direction. And no matter what you decide, your wedding day will be beautiful, heartfelt, and so much fun.

How To Make Your First Look Wedding Photos Feel Natural

If you're leaning toward doing a first look at your wedding but are worried about it feeling inauthentic, here are a few of my favorite tips:

• Choose a quiet location: One where you feel comfortable and somewhere with good light and a little privacy.

• Ask your media team to hang back. We use long lenses so we can capture the moment without being up in your face.

• Don’t mic up. If you’ve hired a videographer and want to keep it intimate, let them know not to record the audio.

• Have a plan you like. Decide if one of you will walk up behind the other, or if you’ll both turn around at the same time.

• Decide if you want to do private vows ahead of time. If so, bring them with you, and after first seeing each other, you can read your vows without an audience listening.

Final Thoughts

At the end of the day, there’s no right or wrong choice—just what feels best for you two.

Whether you decide to do a first look or save that moment for the ceremony, your wedding day should feel like yours. Not Pinterest-perfect. Not planned to impress anyone else. Just genuine, joyful, and true to who you are as a couple.

A first look can give you a quiet moment together, more time for photos, and a chance to actually breathe before the whirlwind kicks in. But if you’ve always pictured locking eyes at the end of the aisle with everyone watching, then lean into that. It’ll be magic either way.

Whatever you choose, your day is going to be beautiful, emotional, a little chaotic (in the best way), and totally unforgettable. Trust your gut, and I’ll be there to capture it all.

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xx,

Tam